Relax your lips. Close your mouth. Chin down. Shoulders back. Face tilted  to the camera. Eyes open wide. NOW SMILE — Click!  

Raise your hand if you are always 100% happy with photographs that are taken of you…either by someone else, or by your-selfie?

Cell phones might be great for communicating, but they may not be the best cameras. If the lighting is bad, you can come off looking like a shadow. And if the flash is too close, you might just end up resembling the one-dimensional character, Flat Stanley.

Notice Flat, his body is positioned  straight-on at the camera (probably because he’s cardboard). Apparently this is the worst possible angle from which to be photographed. No straight-ons. The trick is to create as much dimension as you can for the lens.

Look at this Red Carpet photo of Eva. She can twist her body in so many directions, she could join the circus. And that’s the point. Her head is facing the camera, but every other part of her body is angled…the more angles, the better.

Have you noticed that sorority sisters all seem to have something in common? A distinctive stance. And it’s definitely not slouchy. They must learn this pose in some top-secret, cloak-and-dagger, pledge ceremony. Anyway, it totally works to create dimension in their pics.

But let’s face it ladies, can we really pull off these hands-on-hips, bosoms-out positions? At our age, we might pull a muscle, or worse, we could topple over in mid-photograph. It’s definitely a health risk.

So how can we look better in pictures? I’m already 20 pounds overweight. If the camera adds 10 pounds,  I’ll have to lose 30 pounds just to look normal.

The answer: Enlist the help of some photographers to give us tips on the best ways to pose for the most flattering photos.

So stay tuned. I’ll go ask the professionals.  But for now, just remember: No straight-on photos. You gotta be a poser!